To Love Or Love Less?

May 8, 2017

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  Hi, Dj Chloe!

  I’ve been listening to your station since I met my boyfriend he’s been of great influence to me when it comes to radio station. Anyway, I just want to ask your advice. I am the type of woman who has a very strong personality. I met this guy and we became friends. I know everything about him even his past. I also know his reputation when it comes to women before, and he told me that it was before, and now all he wanted is to have a serious long term relationship. Our friendship continues until the time he became my boyfriend. I could say this is the first time I fell in love for real. I’m not the same “me” anymore since he became my boyfriend. I’ve been doing things I’ve never done before.

  I’m a very dominant person, but now everyone can see he can dominate me more. He showed me so much love and care, and with that, I fell in love with him. I got pregnant last year but had a miscarriage and he still stays by my side. He’s so sweet then but the thing is he’s starting to change now, he always says I shouldn’t be jealous and that I should believe in what he shows to me and what I feel towards him. Dj Chloe, every time my boyfriend and I were together, I never felt even a single bit that he loves me less. Well, in fact, it’s an overflowing love, care, and attention but soon as we parted ways I would start to feel that he’s too busy with other things to the point that it takes a long time before he replies to my messages.  (though he informed me already even before we are still friends that he’s the type of guy who’s focused on work if it’s time to work, and focused on me when he’s with me. That he needs to separate love life from work.) By the way, my boyfriend is 13 years older than me. I don’t know, Dj Chloe, but I really feel that he’s still flirting with other women when I’m not around. I do feel jealous but I’m controlling it. I can’t even confront him. I think I’m stupid because I can’t talk to him about it. I’m so confused and scared if I do that, I’ll lose him. I can’t afford that to happen because I love him so much. He may not be handsome comparing to all the men who are courting me now, but it’s with him I feel so comfortable to the extent that I can’t see myself living without him. Please help me because I don’t know what to do. I’m really scared here. His actions affect me so much.

  And just to give you an update, I got pregnant again early this year and had a miscarriage for the 2nd time this March. I just recently moved into an apartment that he got for me.

  And please never mention my name. Thank you so much and more power.

  Clarisse

  Hi, Clarisse!

  Someone told me that the person who cares less in a relationship is the one who is in control or has control. So, figure that out.

  What happened to the strong willed woman? The woman with a strong personality? I really think that those traits, it’s what attracted this guy to you.

  And now you’re slowly losing him because you “are loving him too much”?, then I guess it’s time to love him a little less and start loving yourself more.

  You can’t seem to point a problem. You haven’t caught him cheating, or maybe you’re afraid to find out?

  If what you think, if your doubts are true, don’t worry. You will know the truth eventually.

  For now, enjoy what you have and enjoy it while it lasts. If it lasts, because you’re killing it softly.

  You got pregnant twice. You never mentioned anything about getting married?

  Well, you don’t have to get married if you don’t believe in it. But I am very sure this is one reason na inuugatan ng insecurity mo.

  In our chatcon, you said you both don’t believe in marriage? Really? You love him too much. I’m sure you will cry your heart out if he comes to you with a little ring asking you to marry him. Don’t be hypocritical, dear.

  The first step of being happy is being TRUE TO YOURSELF.

  Verbalize your insecurities to him. What needs saying, needs saying, dear.

  

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