If a man cares for you, you’ll know it

February 7, 2019

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  Hi po DJ Chloe,

  I hope po that you’re doing fine when this letter reaches you. I’m writing to you po using a dummy account and I hope that’s okay. Anyway po, I’m 34 years old and a single parent of a seven-year (7) old child. After namin maghiwalay nu’ng dad ng anak ko six (6) years ago wala na po akong naging karelationship. I had almost relationships and mga crush here and there pero I remained single for many years. Until summer po last year, I tried some dating app. Meron na po akong mga naging nakausap, naging “boyfriend” but we never met in person. Walang seryosohan ganun. Tapos I met someone na coincedentally just lives in the area as mine. We have the same age pala and binata siya. ‘Yung street na minsan nadadaanan ko pauwi andun lang siya nakatira. We chatted and he was very easy naman to talk to. Ayoko pa makipagmeet kasi I felt like ‘di naman pangseryosohan eh pero naging kami na. But of course, nacurios ako sa kanya and dumaan ako sa bahay nila. He doesnt know na nakita ko na siya and ang weird but feeling ko he is the one. Then mga one (1) month na kami, I have to move sa ibang town for work and after a month we broke up. LDR na kami eh plus we never really met in person although ilang beses na siya nagyaya pero ayoko. After almost two (2) months, nagreach out siya but I blocked him kasi alam ko ‘di kami magwo-work out dahil malayo kami. And then nasundan na naman when he created another account to talk to me. Ang ending ‘di kami ulit nag-usap kasi ‘di na ako interested. Hanggang sa bumalik kami ulit sa dating bahay namin last October. ‘Di ko alam kung natunugan ba niya but he made a way to talk to me again. I don’t know but I thought of giving him a chance again. We finally met for the first time and na-feel ko naman na he is sincere. So naging kami na officially and I have to admit may nangyayari na sa amin. Same kami na years ng single kaya ayun na. Hahaha. I’m really happy with him and eventually nagmeet na sila ng anak ko. He said na ever since naman wala siyang issue about me having a child na. Basta ang alam daw niya ako na ‘yung tao para sa kanya kaya he did his best ma magkabalikan kami. We talked about the future na and gusto na namin magkababy since nasa mid 30’s na kami. We plan sana middle of this year kaso we found out na I am pregnant now. We were both happy and excited. Kaso DJ Chloe, the reason why I wrote to you is medyo naguguluhan ako. Four (4) months pa lang kami, ‘di ko na sinama ‘yung months na naging kami last year, and now I am pregnant. Parang nabilisan din ako sa mga nangyari. ‘Yung about marriage, he said na iipon lang daw and let me leave it up to him daw. Right now, nakaleave ako sa work dahil maselan ako magbuntis and he is somehow supporting naman financially. Medyo natatakot na po kasi ako maiwanan eh, na baka ‘di na naman ito magworkout. Another concern ko po is ‘di pa alam ng parents niya na I’m pregnant. ‘Di pa niya ako napapakilala sa kanila but they know na may girlfriend siya na single mom. For the first time, I’m sacred of being judged because of that na dati naman wala akong pakialam. I love him, DJ Chloe, and I know he loves me too but andun pa rin ung takot sa isip ko. I don’t know kung dahil ba buntis lang ako kaya ako emotional but I guess, gusto ko lang ng assurance from him without pressuring him sa marriage or anything. I want it na manggaling mismo sa kanya but ‘di ko maalis na mag-isip lagi. Pa-enlighten naman po. Salamat and God bless you po.

  Andi

  Hi Andi!

  Well, there’s nothing more you can do but just wait and let time reveal what you’ve gotten yourself into again. Even if tells you what you need to hear, still, time will reveal if he will really, indeed, fulfill what he has told you. Your insecurities are valid and all the more you are emotional because you are pregnant but try as much as you can to stay positive and be a good partner to him. Sabi mo nga, he is somehow supporting naman financially. Wala na eh, andyan ka na, you could have been wiser, tutal naging single ka na for the longest time, kaya lang nabuntis ka na. You can always tell him what and how you feel, from there on you’ll know what you need to know. I am just praying and hoping that this time, you have indeed found the “one”. As for the parents and you being scared of being judged? Well… people will always have their opinion, it will only affect you if it is somehow true.

  

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