When Trusting Hits You So Hard

February 15, 2016

• 

  Dear DJ Chloe,
  This is the first time I’m doing this. Please give me some advice. I don’t know what I’m going to do to get my ex who is back in my life.

  I had a relationship from 2009 until this January 07, 2016. We’re almost together for seven years but our relationship was on and off  because of many reasons. One of them is selos and trust and I admit na naging ganoon ako.

  I am a maritime graduate and now applying for the apprenticeship but before I took it I was sure that I am okay specially my love life. Our job is risky and dangerous which needs concentration in order to work properly. I know it’s hard to understand but I hope maunawaan niyo.

  Last May 2015 umuwi ako sa province namin. Magkatext kami at ‘di ko alam na may iba na pala siya at that time. Last June 2015 bumalik ako dito sa Manila because my company asked me to report but I refused that opportunity dahil may problem ako sa love life ko.  July 11 nagkita kami and accidentally nalaman ko sa Facebook messenger niya na she slept with a guy for two nights, last June 27-28. I’m so disappointed for what she has done but I forgave her. And now she did it again. Last December 2015 habang kinuha ko cellphone niya ‘di niya maibigay sa’kin. Ang dami niyang dahilan. Last January 6, 2016 pinuntahan ko siya sa office niya nang ‘di niya alam. Habang nglalakad kami pasakay ng jeep mas mabilis siyang naglalakad na parang may tinatago which is tama nga naman ang hinala ko. I tried to get her phone pero ‘di niya binigay sa’kin, sa halip aabi niya pa, “kaya ka ba pumunta dito dahil sa cell phone?”, sabay lakad at tumakbo. Sobrang inis ko ‘di ko namalayan na pangit na pala nasabi ko sa kanya. And I decided that time na magbreak na lang kami dahil ganon din naman nglolokohan lang naman ata kami. After two weeks nagtx siya sa’kin and sabi niya ‘di pa daw siya nagkaroon this January pero nalaman ko January 15 nakikipag date siya sa ibang lalaki. At ngayon sila na. Ang tanga ko talagang lalaki dahil habang kami pa ng ex ko dati nkikipagkita pala siya sa lalaking ‘yun at katext niya lagi, hindi ko lang alam.
  DJ Chloe, ngayon naniniwala na ‘ko sa kasabihang, “nawawala ang pagka-edukado ng isang tao pagmanloloko ang karelasyon nito.” Bakit ganoon may mga babae talagang ‘di alam ang salitang “contented”?

  Jackie, I know maririnig mo ‘to. Gusto ko lang malaman mo na mahal na mahal pa din kita. Sorry kung my pagkukulang ako sa relasyon natin. If I hurt you, I deeply apologize. Alam mo ba na since we broke up lagi na lang akong nagpapakalunod sa alak. Baka sakaling makalimutan na kita pero ‘di pala. Nakakamiss ‘yung ma bagay na magkasama tayo–sa lungkot at saya. Nakakamiss ‘yung oras na magkasama tayong dalawa sa pagsisimba.

  Alam mo, Jackie marami ngang babae dito sa mundo pero hindi naman ganoon kadali ‘yun. Oo, hindi pa ako nakakamove-on. Ang hirap pala gawin ang mga bagay-bagay kapag may iniisip kang iba. Siguro months or years pa ako mkakamove-on sa relasyon nating dalawa. Siguro matagal pa ‘ko magkakaroon ng bagong girlfriend. But before that I’ll make sure na handa na ako mkipagrelasyon at nkakamove-on na. Alam ko masaya ka na sa iba. I love you, Jackie for the last time.  Thank you.

  Jhuvil

  Hi, Jhuvil!

  The last time we talked/chatted, you told me you still love her and you’re asking me what to do so you can have her back again.

  She’s a lucky girl to have you, na despite and in spite of, gusto mo pa rin siya.

  If you want her back, you only have to go to her, talk to her and ask her to come back, settle things, compromise, forget the past, and start anew.  If she accepts then good for you. If not, move on. If the person is meant for you, time, chance, life and God will give her back to you. That’s what I know.

  Sometimes we love a person too much that we forget about ourselves; that we deserve someone loving us honestly the way we love them honestly.

  Think about this long and hard, you’re still young and God is moving in your life. He exposed certain things so you will know, maybe He is at work, so you have to trust His will for you.

  Sometimes He removes people in your life so the right ones can come in. I’m not saying she’s the wrong person for you but you have “trust” issues with her. If you can deal with it, go. If not and it will be a recurring issue, let it go.

  Nalalabuan kasi ako eh. She called you to tell you she might be pregnant but she is with someone else already. So pa’no? You ask her that, ano ba gusto niya, ‘di ba?

  In the meantime, fixing your life and focusing on your career is not a bad idea. In fact it’s the best cure for a broken heart.

  Sincerely,

  Chloe

• COMMENTS