What’s Not Meant To Be Is Not Meant To Be

August 24, 2016

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  Hello, DJ Chloe!

  I’m Krish. It’s my 1st time to write about myself.

  I’m married with 1 child. My husband a I have been married for 18 years and we’re okay.

  Ang gusto ko lang i-share or ask your opinion is regarding my high school classmate. Nanligaw siya sa’kin right after high school. But I asked him to comeback after I graduated from college. I took up a two-year course back then. Bumalik siya after two years but unfortunately nagcontinue ako to four-year course. So, nag-usap ulit kami na bumalik ulit siya after I graduated from my 4 yr course.but I told him in the span of four years dapat wala kaming communication to test ourselves. After four years and passing the board exam, bumalik siya ulit. Sabi niya now that I have finished my studies and passing the board baka pwede na but nag-aaral pa siya that time kaya sabi ko tapusin niya muna ‘yung studies niya. He never showed up again after that talk but God knows I’m waiting for him. Ang alam ko nga 12 years akong nag-antay without entertaining other suitors. Ang alam ko lagi siyang nakikibalita sa classmate /friend namin. Then sinabi sa’kin ng friend/classmate namin na he’s not sure anymore and hindi na siya babalik. Nasaktan ako. I told myself na kung merong manliligaw sa’kin and willing na pakasalan ako. Mag-aasawa na ‘ko. Dumating ang husband ko, naging kami for two years then we got married. But our friend/classmate said that he’s still asking about me and she said that “bayaan mo na siya ikakasal na siya.” I got married after 12 years of waiting for him to comeback and still wishing that he showed up sa church to stop the wedding of course it did not happen.

  After two years, accidentally nagkita kami. He’s still single (my husband is not here that time, working abroad.) We text each other almost every day then he’s asking me where I am, magkita daw kami. Hindi ako nakipagkita and I decided to cut our communication. After 6 years gumawa siya ng way para magkita kami through our classmate. But during that time married na siya with a twin. And doon niya sinabi na bumalik siya ,pinuntahan nya ko sa house namin and ang sabi sa kanya hindi na daw ako nakatira don dahil may asawa na ko. Like ko sya sigawan and awayin but I know hindi tama because that time were both married and now with kids. After that pilit akong umiiwas but dahil magkaklase kami before nagkakaron kami ng get-together and reunion. After our reunion five years ago, I promised to myself na hindi na kami dapat magkita. We’re just rubbing salt to the wound. And now, after 30 years he finally asked what happened. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sasagutin dahil ang alam ko if malaman niya kung ano ang nasa isip at puso ko, gugulo lang ang situation. Because until now hindi niya pa din maintindihan kung ano ang nangyari. And he’s full of regrets from what happened to us. I know hindi na dapat pag-usapan at balikan ang past but it’s hurting me a lot. Ang hirap umiwas, from the start umiiwas na ako. Until now ganoon pa din. But I know it’s the right thing to do. Sometimes, I’m tempted to tell him what’s inside my head but alam kong gulo lang. And I’m not sure if dapat pa kaming magkita uli. Thank you very much. I hope you can help me on this.

  Dear Krish,

  Hindi ba dapat pag nagpamilya ka na at nagdecide ka magpakasal na, COMMITTED ka na sa relasyon at sa taong pinli mo?  Bakit ka gumagawa ng ikakagulo ng isip mo, dear?

  30 years? 30 years and nothing happened only means one thing, you were not meant to be!

  What is so hard to understand about that? You are not even supposed to entertain thoughts like this for the simple reason that you are already married for 18 LONG YEARS! Anong problema natin, ate? Or gusto nating magkaproblema, ate?

  Tapos ka ng college, alam mo na dapat gagawin mo. Hindi ko na dapat sabihin sa’yo na dapat hindi mo na ine-entertain itong si kuya or ang  mga ito sa isip mo. At hindi ka na rin dapat nakikibalita sa kanya. At dapat ikaw na mismo bumura sa kung anuman ang nangyari sa inyo kasi nangyari ‘yun for a reason. What reason? Para hindi maging kayo. Kasi hindi nga talaga kayo para sa isa’t-isa. Maybe in the next lifetime but not in this lifetime!

  Now, if you want trouble, go ahead. Reminisce… entertain… and believe things you want to believe regarding this. Ikaw din. 18 years is 18 years. Life is not complicated don’t complicate it please.

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