Learn From The One Who Surpassed It

October 13, 2016

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  Dear DJ Chloe,

  Good day! I am Jhen and I’m only 19 years old. Ang tagal-tagal ko na po na gustong sumulat sa inyo and ngayon lang ako nagkaroon ng lakas ng loob para i-confess.

  I have a boyfriend po kasi DJ Chloe na kasing age ko lang din. We are both college students, psychology ang course ko and accountancy naman po sa kanya. Sobrang bait, walang bisyo, matalino, in fact he always helps me in everything. Mapaproblema man ‘yan sa school o sa personal life ko, one call away lang siya and nandyan lang lagi siya para sa akin. At higit sa lahat ay sa loob na almost four years naming relationship ay never siyang nagloko, napaka good boy niya at wala sa vocabulary niya ang magloko and that’s what I really love about his personality. Ideal man na siya kumbaga.

  But the problem DJ Chloe is me, napakaparanoid ko to the extent na wala naman akong napapala kakahuli sa kanya. May isa siyang classmate na lagi kong ini-issue sa kanya pero ang ending napapahiya lang ako sa sarili ko kakahuli sa kanya dahil wala naman akong napapala. Lagi na lang akong may trust issues sa kanya. It’s just that, I feel so paranoid sometimes dahil natatakot ako na baka mawala siya sa akin.Another thing pa is ‘yung issue ko sa paglalaro niya ng DOTA. For almost four years DJ Chloe ito na lang lagi ang issue ko sa kanya. He is telling me na ito na nga lang daw ‘yung stress reliever niya in everything. Naglalaro daw siya para mawala ‘yung stress niya lalo na sa school tapos pipigilan ko pa daw. I don’t know, DJ Chloe. Kahit ilang beses ko pang itatak sa utak ko na hindi naman ako dapat magalit, minsan hindi talaga maiwasan. Because of these issues nagbreak kami kahapon lang. Siguro sobra na din siyang napuno sa’kin at nasabi niya kahapon na mahirap daw magstay sa relationship wherein laging questioned ang “TRUST”.

  Alam ko naman po na ako lang talaga ang may kasalanan dito dahil sobra akong exaggerated sa lahat ng situations. Mabilis akong magalit sa mga bagay na hindi naman dapat kinagagalit and kahit nag-explain na siya sa mga bagay na kinagalit ko ay sarili ko na lang lagi ‘yung pinapakinggan ko. Whenever we have fights and misunderstandings ay siya lang lagi ang sumusuyo at nagbababa ng pride niya para maging okay kaming dalawa. Haaayy… I really hate this feeling, DJ Chloe. Hindi ko siya kayang mawala. I really feel so devastated about our break-up. Hindi ako makatulog at makakain ng maayos, hindi rin ako makafocus sa studies ko. What should I do to have him back? Hindi ko kaya kung wala siya. I can’t afford to lose him, he is the one I want to spend my future with. Gusto ko na po talagang baguhin ‘yung attitude ko towards him and if he will gave me another chance I will make things better. Thank you for listening to my problem and thanks in advance, prangkahin niyo lang po ako, DJ Chloe. Ayos lang po ‘yun sa’kin. Looking forward po ako sa advice niyo, DJ Chloe.

  Jhen

  Hello!

  You know what Jhen, napaka generic ng advice na ibibigay ko sa’yo. And this I have heard many times when I was your age, and seriously and with all honesty, sana sinunod ko at pinakinggan ko. I will point out one very important thing and that one thing is what really matters right now in your life….

  Ito ‘yun: you are only 19 years old and you do not have the slightest idea what your parents are doing  for you to finish college. So it would be very fitting and it would be the very best thing to do if you please finish school first before anything else.

  I do understand the love and I do understand that maybe you found the love of your life. A  guy who loves you and who is true to you except that he is addicted to DOTA. But your standards will change when you’re 25, 35, and even 45. Bata ka pa. Much as I want to tell you what you need to do, it would be better na ‘wag na. Mas gugustuhin ko pang iyakan mo na lang ‘yan at hindi ka na balikan pa ng boyfriend mo kesa hindi ka makatapos at maagang kang makapag asawa.

  You’re just a girl and he is only just a boy. Period.

  Sorry, killjoy na kung killjoy. Been there, done that. Magtapos ka and make something out of yourself. You will need all the education to find a good job, and all the confidence to deal with people and to cope up,  when the time is right for you to start a family with the man you choose to be with for the rest of your life.

  

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