3 Things To Know Before You Love Someone

Camille Obispo & Adi Miguel

July 7, 2017

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  Love is more than just a feeling, it’s a decision. It is not something people learn or earn overnight. Just like what C.S. Lewis said, “to love is to be vulnerable.”

  It’s always easy to be in a relationship but it’s not always easy to commit. It’s not always easy to compromise comfort, give up time, and exert too much effort. To love is to give more than your all, it’s cliche. Because it’s always true that love is not for the faint-hearted.

  In love you have to consider some things…

  TRUST

  Trust is the root of most failed relationships, nowadays. It’s either people trust too much or doesn’t trust at all. Too much trust may lead to infidelity while not trusting at all may lead to a stressful relationship. To be in love is indeed a tricky situation.

  With all these trust issues we have, we also have to be trust-worthy. The thing is we easily see if they deserve our trust. But on the other hand, have we also considered ourselves? Are we also deserving of the trust they give us? It’s not only what we see. We also have to check where are we in all of these things.

  DONE WITH THE PAST

  Have you checked if you’re healed? Have you checked your heart if it’s okay to love again? Have you considered if the remnants of past pains is in your heart still? Are you totally over?

  Because if not then maybe, just maybe, it’s unfair to the other end. It’s unfair waking up everyday knowing that you’re not yet okay but you force yourself to give your all to the person next to you. It’s unfair that you don’t trust the one you’re currently love just because you haven’t moved on from the pains of the past. It’s unfair that everything around you reminds you of the other person instead of making new memories with the person in front of you. To love is to give your all, with no doubts, without reservations, without any pain. When you give your heart to the new one make sure you’re giving it wholly. It’s okay to have scars but not scratches or wounds that are just about to heal.

  COMPROMISE

  Some people would look at this as something ‘too much’. But again, to love is to give your all in all. One of the things that you have to ask yourself is if you’re ready to compromise. Are you ready to set aside what you love for the person you love? Are you ready to give way for the needs of the one you love? Are you ready to say ‘sorry’ even if it hurts your ego so much?

  This is what our generation forgets. We forget sacrifice. You can’t love without sacrificing. It’s not always the career or the future. It’s not always the things we love and the support that we need. To love is to give much and take a little. To love is to think about the person you love’s happiness and not only your own. To love is to make dreams with the other and not only yourself. We compromise a lot when we love.

  There are a lot of lessons that the universe will teach you when you get in a relationship. What works for you may not work for the other. But there is a general rule when it come to love–it conquers all things.

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