Just Accept And Face Reality — He Is Not For You

August 28, 2017

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  Hi DJ Chloe,

  I just need an advice kung ano ba dapat kong gawin. Itago niyo na lang po ako sa name na Lee. I’m 42 years old na and I have two kids pero naghiwalay na po kami ng husband ko since 2010. To make the story short, may pinakilala po thru Facebook ang friend ko sa akin taga U.S. po siya, Pinoy siya pero matagal na sa US divorced na siya. Since then araw-araw kami nagkakausap, as in consistent ‘yung communication namin hanggang sa sinagot ko na siya after one month namin. umuwi sya dito sa Pinas at nagkita kami at s’yempre may nangyari na sa amin. After one week bumalik na ulit siya sa U.S. consistent pa rin ang communication although may konting tampuhan pero naging okay pa rin relationship namin. Last October umuwi na naman siya sa Pinas at nagkita ulit kami. Wala naman kami problema pero may time na nagseselos ako every time na maglike at comment siya sa post ng mga friends niya. Pero ‘yun lang pinag-aawayan naming, ang babaw, ‘di ba? Pero pag nag-aaway kami magde-deactivate siya after how many nagme-mesage siya. Ganun lang. Ilang beses ko na siya hiniwalayan, ayaw niya.

  Noong last week inamin niya na may girlfriend na siya dun na Amerikana. Pero ‘di naman daw niya mahal pero nasasaktan ako nang nalaman ko. Ano ba ang gagawin ko DJ Chloe? Ang sakit ng naramdaman ko kasi malayo kami sa isa’t-isa. Makipaghiwalay na lang ba ako sa kanya ng tuluyan? Sana mabigyan mo ako ng advice thank you and more power.

  Pahabol, may mga plans naman siya sa amin kaya na-appreciate ko siya ng sobra pero ‘di ko maiwan ang work ko.

  Lee

  Hi Lee,

  ‘Pag nabuking siya ng “girlfriend” niya na “Amerikana” malamang sasabihin niya din dun eh hindi ka niya mahal.

  What’s the point of keeping it from you from the start? If that’s really true na may girlfriend siya that means he lied and he cheated and he deceived you. It’s enough reason for you to call it quits.

  I know what you’re thinking. This might work, he might just bring you there and your kids. But is there an offer? Yes, there are plans, but how concrete and doable are his/your plans?

  You can’t leave your work? Why? Can’t you take you a leave for two weeks and see for yourself kung anong merong nag-aantay sa’yo sa Amerika with him?

  P’wede naman, ‘di ba? Apply for tourist visa and see for yourself. You can finance your own trip or maybe if he is generous enough, pwede niyong paghatian. Kung talagang may plano kayo.

  Baka naman you’re just basing everything on assumptions?

  Masakit man aminin sa sarili pero maaaaring umuwi lang yan dito to probably also see what’s in store for him, to find out how he feels about you.

  Naisip ko lang, biglang nagsurface na may girlfriend daw pala siya. Could it be that he is just making a good “exit” in your life?

  Kung may concrete plans ‘yan for you, nu’ng nagkita kayo, may nangyari sa inyo, dapat by this time planning na kayo how to get you there and your kids or maybe him thinking of residing here with you.

  There’s nothing clear sa letter mo except for the fact that something happened to both of you when he was here and it seems after that problems started coming in.

  

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