You Give Yourself The Closure

September 20, 2016

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  Hi DJ Chloe,

  How are you? I hope you’re doing well.

  I am seeking for your help but please hide my identity.

  I am single for more than two years and he is in a relationship now for exactly two years.

  We were together for almost two years at mas matagal ‘yung naging long distance relationship kami kasi he is working abroad. Hindi na kami naging okay hanggang sa umuwi siya dito sa Pinas. But because we love each other, we decided na i-work out pa din ‘yung relationship namin. After a month, humingi ako ng space kasi I felt something wrong with us kasi may mga nababasa akong chat at gimik niya with other girls.

  To make the long story short, bumalik siya sa abroad to work again. Okay naman ‘yung communication namin and he said na kaya daw siya babalik abroad para sa future namin at sa kasal namin ‘pagbalik niya dito sa Pinas. But unfortunately, my nameet siyang girl and he said type daw siya nu’ng girl and he will grab the opportunity daw para maregular siya dun sa work niya since malakas daw ‘yung girl sa management. And as usual, he said again na para ‘yun sa future namin at kasal. Nagalit ako kasi ayaw ko ng ganung setup. Sabi niya maregular lang daw siya babalikan niya daw ako. Until now DJ Chloe sila pa din, hahaha. I’m still single not because I’m waiting for him but I don’t know exactly the reason. I “forgive and forget” na din naman but we’re not friends anymore. So what’s the point of sharing my story? The point is, it’s been more than two years and I already moved on pero bakit lagi ko syang napapanaginipan? Masaya, kami ulit at mahal ulit namin ang isa’t isa. Anong reason? Do we really need to have a closure? Closure for what? I’ve heard na din naman na they are planning na for their wedding. But what is this, DJ Chloe? I want peace of mind. I want to have sweet dreams. Gusto ko nang makalaya sa nakaraan.

  Please help me DJ Chloe and thank you in advance.

  Miss G

  Dear Miss G,

  Maybe because there is too much pain in your heart na tinatago mo by pretending that you’re okay. Unconsciously, ‘yung panaginip mo na masaya kayo, na you are back in each other’s arms eh ‘yun talaga ang gusto mo.

  But then again, reality check, talagang niloko ka niya. Well, let’s give him the benefit of the doubt baka naman talaga parte ng plano niya ‘yung patulan si girl para maregular at tapos babalikan ka. Kasi na in love na din siguro siya and he probably realized ‘yun ang gusto niyang babae. ‘Yun ang gusto niyang buhay. Forgive him for wanting more in this life.

  As for you, you can just peacefully accept that he is gone and not coming back and start with your  healing process. He left you and God allowed these things to happen because he is redirecting you to someone WHO WILL NOT USE YOU. Like how your ex used the other girl.

  Once you realize that and once you accepted the fact that you don’t deserve a user things will be better for you. And yes, you need closure and you don’t need him to give you closure. YOU GIVE YOURSELF CLOSURE. End his chapter in your life. NOW.

  

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