5 Things I Learned From Mom About Boys And Love

Adi Miguel

January 12, 2016

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  No one will teach you best about relationship besides your mom and your dad. And for every girl, her mom is her undeclared bestest friend. Mom is your default frienemy and your best love guru.

  Believe it or not, there will be a moment in your lifetime that you’ll sit with mom after dinner and talk about random things. And there will be moments too when you’re so fed up with love and life that you’ll make ways just to have that after-dinner talk with mom.

  Girls, your mom may not be perfect but she knows best for you.

  1. MOM SAID, RESERVED WOMEN ATTRACT MEN BUT RESERVED WOMEN DO NOT MAKE HISTORY.

  Mom caught dad’s attention because she’s just the simple girl in the corner amidst loud girls. Yes, this is working before and in the movies. The boy meets girl kind of love story. That’s the trend of women then.

  Today, you have options. First, to be that reserved women from the movies. Second, to be the person you are meant to be.

  Men like women who are not loud and very simple. But in this generation where men and women are already equal in all aspects, mom says, “chase the woman you are meant to be and let the man who won’t be intimidated by who you are come in the right time.”

  2. MOM SAID, DON’T NAG.

  You see him talking to an unknown girl over Facebook messenger? You checked his phone and he got more conversation to random girls than you do? You saw his photos on mutual friends’ Instagram partying without you knowing it? Someone told you that he was out with someone you’ve been jealous to? What did you do?

  Yell at him over the phone? Shouted at him in public? Accused and labeled him on your raged text message?

  Stop doing that.

  Every man wants an understanding woman. We know that you’re losing patience and you’re pushed to your limits. But mom says, don’t talk to him while you’re mad. Let your anger out without him. Cry if you must. Don’t answer his calls if you can. Scream. You can do anything just to let it out. And when you’re about to talk to him, hold his hand and tell him everything that you saw and knew in a very, very, calming voice. No men won’t be guilty of that. And mom says, if you need to let go, face it. Don’t be hard on yourself.

  3. MOM SAID, LEAVE SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF.

  Love will always be a beautiful thing. Giving it all is part of it and so is getting hurt. But mom said, when life and love’s giving you reasons to move away and let go, do it. Moving on from love might be too hard to handle but mom said, trust the journey. Because before you do, mom has done it. She knows, remember?

  You always have to leave something for yourself. Don’t let love ruin you because it’s not suppose to. It should always build, it should always give you more reason to love.

  4. MOM SAID, YOU CAN FLIRT WITHOUT TAKING YOUR CLOTHES OFF.

  It would always be your choice but boys know if you’re the girl who can be brought to bed right away. You were at a party with friends and he’s already flirting you. His hands are around your waste, he’s caressing your hair, he brings you at an exclusive place, it’s up to you if you’ll permit what happens next.

  Mom said, it’s okay to hang out with boys. That’s part of growing up. Take note that every action has a consequence, and you have to think of that all the time.

  Men still likes women who resist the norm; women who would say “no” to sex before marriage, to women who obey their parents; women who flirt in a decent way. Men like liberated women with a class. They find them the marrying type.

  5. MOM SAID, LET HIM TAKE OVER.

  Despite your strength as a woman, despite your independence, let him do his work as a boyfriend. Sometimes you have to adjust. Sometimes you have to be stupid and needy because it boosts their ego. It makes them a man.

  Stop being Ms. Know-It-All. Stop being the girl who can live without a man. Stop doing that. Try him. Try depending your decisions to him. Try asking his opinion in all your life quests. He wants that. That line from #WalangForever, “Isali mo naman ako sa plano mo…” is real. Even if they won’t tell you, they want to.

  Mom said, for a time try considering him. You’ve been doing and handling life all alone, try it with someone now. Mom said, that’s part of love.

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