An open letter to the one who was almost destroyed by an unrequited love – Part I

Troyka Lunar

February 26, 2021

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  Unrequited love is very complex.

  It can either make or break a person. It can be beautiful because it is pure; loving someone despite the truth that they will never love you back and it makes you realize that your heart has the capacity to love someone that much without asking or getting anything in return. On the other hand, unrequited love can be self-destructive.

   “I know where I stand and loving him is my happiness; even if I am the only one loving.” These are the exact words that a person on a one-sided love would usually tell you. Sure, you mean it. You’ll take care of him, you’ll attend to his needs, you’ll love him more for every good detail that you see in him and you’ll see past his imperfections. You’ll brush off how crappy he makes his coffee by telling yourself, “That’s okay! I make good coffee. I can make his coffee for as long as he wants and that makes us a good match.” You’ll even find it cute when you discover that he is a “mama’s boy” and you’ll ask yourself, “What’s wrong with being a mama’s boy? I can take care of him just like how his mom takes care of him.” 

  You’ll babble on about him to your friends like he’s the most wonderful person anyone can meet and you will love him unconditionally even if it makes you look foolish and stupid sometimes. You will still love him even if it hurts so bad because you have always believed that true love is unconditional; that you need not to be loved back, but simply to just love.

  While this is the bittersweet truth of unrequited love, eventually at some point, you will start to realize that no matter how much you tell the world that you are crazy in love with this person, if he’s not into you, he is just not into you. You will eventually come into your senses that no matter how much love you give, if that’s not what he wants, that love will never be enough.

  End result? You’ll start to lose yourself because the pain of loving someone who does not and cannot love you in return like the way you wanted to be loved will start to hurt more. This is when you’ll start asking yourself, “Is loving someone unconditionally worth it?” This is how unrequited love can be self-destructive. When you reach this point, you will only have two choices: you move on or you lose yourself completely.

  They say that the best way to lose is to lose yourself to the person you love. Are you willing to accept defeat?

   

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